Yipppeee! It's Primal Scream Friday



Complaining's an underrated pleasure, isn't it? Join the fun! Note, I fully encourage the use of capitals, it's ever so much more satisfying. Here goes:

I JUST READ A PREDICTION THAT THE RECESSION WILL LAST TILL APRIL OF 2010—AND THAT'S THE BEST-CASE SCENARIO. CRAP.

INSURANCE COMPANY, NOT ONLY ARE YOU TELLING ME THAT YOU WILL NO LONGER PAY FOR MAX'S THERAPY BILLS, BUT YOU ARE SAYING THAT YOU HAVE NOT RECEIVED BILLS THAT I SENT TO YOU (YOU KNOW, THE ONES THAT YOU DO NOT WANT TO PAY). INSURANCE COMPANY, THERE IS A SPECIAL PLACE IN HELL FOR YOU AND WHEN YOU GET THERE AND BEG FOR A DRINK OF WATER YOU WILL BE TOLD, "SORRY, YOUR PLAN DOESN'T COVER THAT."

CHILDREN, WHY MUST YOU KEEP SLEEPING IN OUR BED? WHY DO I KEEP I LETTING YOU? WHY AM I SHOUTING AT MYSELF?

A POOL OF WATER KEEPS FORMING AT THE BOTTOM OF MY DISHWASHER WHEN IT'S NOT EVEN IN USE. MY PLAN IS TO KEEP PRETENDING THIS IS NOT HAPPENING, AS THERE ARE APPROXIMATELY 459 THINGS I WOULD RATHER SPEND MONEY ON THAN DISHWASHER REPAIR.

CHEETOS, THERE IS A SPECIAL PLACE IN HELL FOR YOU, TOO.

That is all.

Photo by Gregory Pleau

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